These days, an everyday moment of “… ow, why is my back hurting SO much” while waddling around the house, passing the entryway mirror and noticing the huge belly/bump/balloon protruding from my front to remind me that – oh yeah, I’m pregnant, like REALLY pregnant… 37.5 weeks pregnant to be exact! And that may be why I am sore, tired, experiencing intense back pain, and also incredibly grateful all at the same time.
Let me backtrack for a moment here, *spoiler alert* ready? Pregnancy is not the glamorous, fun-filled, over the moon, emotional experience that is frequently portrayed and shoved in front of our faces these days… it just isn’t, well, at least it hasn’t been for me. We are grateful to be here, don’t get me wrong! But it’s been quite a ride.
For me and my husband, it’s really been a harsh and bumpy road to arrive to this moment. After two pregnancy losses in 2017, our worlds were shaken. After many more trials and tribulations that accompanied these losses, all within the course of the same year- we both found ourselves in uneven, foreign territory, unsure of what the future would hold for us. But as is with time, and with life, there turned out to be a light at the end of the tunnel. We came out stronger, more at peace, and learned from what the year taught us. And sure enough, welcomed our third pregnancy, which has overall been healthy, and happy thus far to say the least.
What I’ve learned from our experiences, is that pregnancy is one of those things that is just so personal, yet expected to be so impersonal. People in your life and around you may try to be understanding of your unique pregnancy experience, or on the other hand may be very quick to judge, but at the end of the day, it’s YOUR journey, no matter how you take it. And as badly as you may want someone to, they may never really understand what you are going through- and that’s ok. They really don’t have to. We just have to respect that we all have worked hard to get where we are, and that if you are looking to be a parent of any kind- we are all in the same boat together. And if you are not looking to ever be a parent, or find that the timing is not quite right- hey, I totally respect that decision. I know plenty of amazing, phenomenal actual people who have decided not to take this same step, and both respect them and am thrilled for more aunts and uncles for my future family.
Anyways, so back to why pregnancy isn’t glamorous, I find that mamas-to-be fall into one of two main categories: the blissfully unawares, and the overly cautious and “awares.” I fell into the latter. I kept a journal of my pregnancy journey so far that I want to share with you, broken up into each trimester. I felt probably every feeling and emotion under the sun for these past 37.5 weeks, and I am finally feeling really ready to meet this little one. I hope my journey inspires you to fully enjoy and love your own… stay tuned